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The Apprentice, Week 17: The Live Finale at NYU Skirball Performing Arts Center
Original Air Date: 5/19/05
(PAGE 2 of 4)
Hehe. Trump enters into big boo-boo mode as he calls out, “Kristen, she [Kendra] in a certain way cried over you. What did you think of Kendra?” If her face were actually capable of expression, Kristen would look awfully confused right now. Her lips, completely independent of her face, move up and down, as if she meant to speak, at which point Trump goads, “C’mon, you go.” Finally someone says uncertainly, “You mean Erin?” But we all must understand that Trump is never wrong, that he is addressing the correct woman, even though Kristen was never on the same team as Kendra. “No, I’m talking to Kristen. What did you think of Kendra? What did you think of Tana? What was your choice?” Nice save.
In a shocking twist, Kristen roots for Tana, but before anyone in America might get it into their head that Tana has a real shot at this job, Trump cuts her right off. Rather than hearing any more support for Tana, he turns towards Erin Elmore for a little Kendra lovin’. Eyes-a-popping and hair-a-flipping as only Erin can pull off, she concludes vehemently, “We certainly weren’t stooges; we were valued employees.”
And now we get to meet Bill Rancic and Kelly Perdew. Again. They look very officious sitting up there with Trump. Bill is “overseeing” construction of Trump Tower in Chicago, which essentially means donning a hard hat every few episodes. He also “has” an “active” role in “sales and marketing” of the building. Kelly is doing something with Trump Place in New York, is “active” in selling Trump Ice, and also stares blankly at an apartment space asking how much it’s worth. So he has three jobs? Or, perhaps a quote from Newsweek is appropriate here: “Perdew's desk is in a small, windowless space next to the assistant to Donald Trump's wife, Melania (Perdew has no assistant). The walls are bare, except for a dry-erase board and a U.S. map, stuck with pins marking the distributors he's signed to buy his boss's new line of bottled water, Trump Ice.” All this for a cool $250,000 salary, and I’m thinking perhaps I got into the wrong business.
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Trump gently reaches back and removes Kelly’s head from his butt for a moment to ask him, “Kelly, how has your army experience helped?” Kelly gasps for air and sputters, “Yadda yadda, teamwork, passion, yadda yadda.” Trump grasps Kelly’s head firmly, but lovingly: “Excuse me, do you love working for Trump?” Kelly sighs, knowing where his head will soon return. “I love it.” “DO YOU LOVE IT?” Aack. I can’t take it.
Bill is totally cute. What lips. He claims to have learned a lot this year. So have I, Bill, so have I. He first diplomatically shows some support for Tana, who is a “hustler,” before referring to her bad leadership in the last task. Man, I bet she’s still crying herself to sleep over that fiasco. Tana valiantly tries to redeem herself: “This wasn’t the ‘Tana task,’” but really we know it’s a lost cause here.
Damn, what a lot of commercials. Hey, there’s Kelly pimping out the armed services. Cuz if you kids join the army now, you might someday get to work for Donald Trump, and not, you know, fight in Iraq or anything.
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Excuse me, do you love working for Trump? DO YOU
