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The Apprentice, Week 14:
Hanes Commemorative T-Shirts, Pop Artists Burton Morris and Romero Britto, and Rockstar Couture
Original Air Date: 4/28/05
(PAGE 4 of 6)
The bickering twosome manage to swallow their angst and sell T-shirts the next morning. Kendra is quite proud as she tells George about their marketing efforts. A couple of art collectors, who clearly have too much time and money on their hands, stop by. Some British women are all intrigued by the claim, “There’s only 288 of these in the world.” Call me picky, but I’d be more impressed if there were only, like, twenty in the world. And even then I can smell a Beanie Baby “limited-edition” gimmick a mile away.
Some ominous music plays as we hear Craig whisper to the British ladies—who have a hard time understanding this creepy man’s creepy whisper—that he’ll cut them a deal after they’ve already handed him the money. He sells them two $35 shirts for $60, when they weren’t even haggling in the first place! Kendra’s all, “Um, hey Craig.” She tells Craig, rather nicely, to cut that crap out. Craig defends himself, “I’m only doing that if they buy multiples.” I think the “multiples” defense only works when the multiple in question is larger than two. THEN, he says he’s only doing it to “appease” her because she had wanted to price them lower. What a wanker.
Over at Net Worth, Tana is still talking up the rhinestone idea, which I still think is tacky.
“When the light hits it, you feel like you’re wearing diamonds.” No. No, you do not. Still, she offers to “stud one up” for a girl, who agrees. Methinks said girl is staged, especially when her total comes to $153 and she doesn’t bat an eyelash.
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Ah, the boardroom. The teams troop in wearing their T-shirts. When asked how they did, Craig says confidently, “We did better than they did.” Trump responds, “That’s nice Craig, you’re learning.” Learning what? That must relate to a previous conversation that we weren’t privy to, like “Craig? Craig who? Oh, that guy who never speaks in the boardroom. Hey Craig, speak up!” Then Trump asks him who did the selling, and Craig says smoothly, “That would be me.” Kendra looks shocked. Shocked, I tell you! “We both sold,” she announces. Craig kind of shrugs and says, “Well, yeah.” Well, yeah? You tell a flat out lie and counter it with “Well, yeah”? Kendra asserts that she sold better than Craig, while Craig respectfully disagrees.
Whatever. The totals come in. Net Worth sold 33 very expensive ugly-ish rhinestoney shirts for $1147.95. Magna sold 101 less expensive, rhinestone-free ugly-ish shirts for $2,705. Alex actually does a kind-of-cute “Aww, man!” expression. Aww, it’s the death of Net Worth, and Magna is rewarded by hopping on fighter planes to dog fight each other. Whoa momma! Craig’s eyes bug out almost as far as that lady who can pop them out of her sockets. Kendra brags that her father was a Top Gun instructor, and One-Up Craig boasts, “MY father was in the Air Force!” Kendra is so happy that she just keeps grabbing Craig’s sleeve. Hmmm, I wonder if all that animosity and butthole-ness is just a manifestation of some weird and disturbing attraction.
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When the light hits it, you feel like you’re wearing diamonds.
