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The Apprentice, Week 11: American Eagle Outfitters and Wearable Tech
Original Air Date: 4/7/05
(PAGE 2 of 5)
Chris toddles out to Best Buy to get the electronic equipment, which totals $3,936.58. Not all-that-dramatic drama ensues when he rejoins the team and discovers that a credit card is missing. Alex is über-pissed off, complaining to us, “On the inside, I’m thinking, ‘Dude, you friggin’ lost this credit card; are you kidding me? How could you do that?’” Why on the inside? Why not just smack Chris around and kick him off the team because that would be really fun to watch. The Metrosexual versus the Man o’ Squeal.
Trump’s lesson of the week: “Let nothing get in your way.” He explains further, “For me, failure is never an option.” Which is so terribly cliché, and I’m not sure exactly how his two failed marriages aren’t considered to be, you know, failures. And let’s not forget the numerous bankruptcies, not to mention his choice in hairdressers…but hey, he is a successful man overall. Cut to him yelling on his cell, “You guys didn’t do a job, and you weren’t there, and you know you weren’t there, and the deal never would have gotten done with the other guys.” So someone else’s failure is not an option either. He reiterates his point by lecturing, “If you can’t go through a wall, you go under it, around it, over it. There is no such thing as failure.” Got it, sir; got it.
On his way back to Best Buy to find the missing credit card, Chris is talking to himself about wanting pretzels. I mean, he could be talking to the camera men and such, but when your sanity has been called into question so many times, it’s wise to be careful how you behave in public. Oddly, the store doesn’t seem to have the credit card, but Chris seems convinced that they do and refuses to budge from his position in front of large-screen TVs blinking the Best Buy logo. He brags, “Since I have quit [chewing tobacco] cold turkey, it’s not that bad. I actually find myself being less aggressive.” To the guy standing next to him, who obviously doesn’t give a crap about anything that’s happening, Chris says oh-so-unaggressively, “I hope they find that credit card. Otherwise I’ll have to find an aluminum bat and break somebody’s kneecaps.” The guy he’s addressing continues to look completely uninterested.
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Back at Magna, Tana is explaining their clothing line, “Wearable Tech.” To her credit, Tana nearly makes this sound like a desirable thing: “The WT, that’s wearable tech!” Yeah! Hook me up with a pair of jeans that I can shove my laptop into, thereby giving me the dual benefit of easy e-mail access and a firm, if square-ish butt. Craig chastises Kendra’s complete lack of ideas and innovation. She even pulls a kind of Erin Elmore when she complains, “I’m not technical, and sewing and design and stuff.” Not technical? Like doesn’t-know-how-to-work-a-cell-phone not technical or the has-never-designed-a-clothing-line-before kind of not technical? Because if it’s the latter, that’s just dumb. No one on the team knows how to sew. If it’s the former, well, then Kendra has much larger issues that we can’t deal with right now.
Even so, I can’t stand Craig’s condescension, “If this isn’t your thing, shut up.” Still, I can’t argue with his logic. Kendra is nearly in tears as she whines about being hungry and picked on. Thank goodness for Tana, whose mommy instincts kick right in: “I don’t need any babies here, I just want to get the job done… let’s just design it.”
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I hope they find that credit card. Otherwise I’ll have to find an aluminum bat and break somebody’s kneecaps.
