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Week 4: "Soap Dopes"
Original Air Date: 2/10/05
(PAGE 7 of 9)
Yay, Net Worth’s commercial. “Boy, that’s terrible.”
Audrey immediately goes on the defensive and seems to have no problem capturing Trump’s undivided attention. “I think Kristen was terrible…these gentlemen came up with a joke, and she didn’t follow through with it. She doesn’t have the personality to make it funny.” Ouch, that was one helluva zinger packed in there somewhere.
John jumps in to agree that the ad was supposed to be funny…but that’s not really even the issue right now. Carolyn can’t quite comprehend: “Don’t you use body wash in a shower, or with water? You just put it on his face; he wipes it off. It was disgusting.” In a total BS move, Kristen whines, “We were going to use water but the models were very difficult to work with.” Say what? I never saw that part. Ahh, Kristen is trying to shift the blame to Tana and Audrey, who were “in charge” of the models. Not so, says Tana. “The models were nice and happy.” And really, what’s better than a happy model?
George wants to hear from Chris, because he’s being uncharacteristically quiet. I think George just knows that hearing Chris talk makes for great entertainment, because the boy sounds like Mickey Mouse on crack on the verge of an aneurism. Baby Spice doesn’t fail us now, as he squeaks/screams, “We were told to come up with something bold. Ours may not be as bold, but we weren’t over the top in the homosexual connotation. I think that’s disturbing.” Oh lordy, lordy Chris. Erin covers her mouth in shock, while Trump looks like he’s in pain.
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Still, no one can say that Trump doesn’t know how to have a little fun. He asks Chris, “Are you not a homosexual?”
“Sir, I am not a homosexual.”
“Oye, yoi yoi,” Erin moans, taking a cue from Trump’s earlier Hasidic moment. She’s quick to jump on Chris who thinks that the gay theme didn’t target a wide enough audience. “Who watches Will & Grace?” she snipes. “A show about gay men. Women, women, womenwomenwomen.”
Erin chooses Bren and Michael to come in, while Kristen chooses Audrey and Tana. Nothing too surprising there.
When they return, Kristen immediately launches into defense mode: “I sat there, I directed. I was doing many things, as I do in every single task. That’s what I do—I can multitask.” Blah blah blah. I’ve noticed that people who like to talk a lot about how great they are rarely get much done during the day.
Even though I’m not sure of the connection, Audrey still sounds pretty astute for saying, “Also she pointed out, Mr. Trump, that her boyfriend is a director…she’s made a point that she’s been on a set before. But she has no respect for people who were on the set.” I mean, having been on a set before doesn’t necessarily mean automatic respect for the people on it, but whatever. I’m on Audrey’s side.
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Sir, I am not a homosexual.
