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Week 4: "Soap Dopes"
Original Air Date: 2/10/05
By Sarika Chawla
Up in the suite, the teams discuss the boardroom situation from last week. Angie McKnight wants to know if Donald Trump actually said, at any point, that Michael Tarshi was not exempt from being fired. She grumbles to us privately that “Magna are idiots” for convincing Danny Kastner to bring in Michael to the boardroom.
Clasping her hands and twisting up her face, Angie sarcastically says, “You’re so smart, and they’re college grads, and they’re lawyers. They’re so intelligent.” Actually, by now, I’ve practically forgotten that the teams are comprised of those with intellectual horsepower who graduated from, um, the University of Memphis, and uneducated scrappers with a chip on their collective shoulder. But I guess, what with Trump’s constant harping on the subject, they’re having a hard time letting it go.
The discussion continues, and Erin Elmore rolls her head around uncontrollably as she argues, “Exemption schmagemption!” Wow. I don’t think I know how to spell schmagemption. With her head still bobbing every which way, she says she’s sure Trump will fire Michael…right before he walks in. No one is very happy about it, including me, because I just remembered that I’m supposed to hate him.
Bren Olswanger drives the point home, saying, “Michael has zero tact, zero integrity, and zero character.” We get a rare glimpse into his personal life next when he says, “The dad in me just awoke. Someone’s been bad and needs to be disciplined.” Which totally humanizes him and makes me feel really, really bad for making fun of his utterly lame bowties and stupid haircut.
Bren chastises Michael for being such a jerkwad in the last task, and Michael basically licks his cowboy boots and apologizes. “I expect you to act like a man from now on. You need to step up to the plate,” Bren says, effectively destroying any attachment I may have developed in the past thirty seconds. Besides, I do recall Michael at least spinning a plate on his head last week, if not actually stepping up to it. Still, Michael emerges with only a tiny brown stain on his nose, and everyone’s happy. Damn it, I thought I was supposed to hate him. I’m so confused.
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Alex Thomason is looking good. This week he’s mixed up his wardrobe and come up with a nice metrogeek style, with a pair of cute wire-rimmed glasses and a black leatherish jacket. Mmm…leatherish.
Tana Goertz picks up the call from Rona, and boy, I hope that never happens again. Tana’s a lovely, intelligent woman, but perhaps it’s best that the face not go on camera first thing in the morning.
Via teleconference, Trump explains that he’s Really Quite Rich. Actually he just says, “I’m not going to be with you today. I’m heading over to my helicopter for a business trip.” Kendra Todd’s mouth is hanging slightly ajar, and Erin practically drools onto the table. I wonder how far Trump has to go that he “needs” a helicopter instead of just a regular car? Like Chicago? The Upper East Side? Trump Tower?
The teams are going to meet ad guru Mr. Donny Deutsch, who apparently is quite famous in his field, but I’ve never heard of him before this show. They’re going to do something for a huge account, Dove Cool Moisture. Even cute Audrey Evans is all excited, squeaking, “I was just like wow. Donny, I’m coming to see you!”
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Exemption schmagemption!
