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The Apprentice, Week 13: Staples and
The Desk Apprentice
Original Air Date: 4/21/05
(PAGE 5 of 5)
It all turns into a really confusing mass of accusations and complaints, with everyone egging Alex and Bren to keep talking until one of them sticks his foot in his mouth. Carolyn calls out Bren for not doing a focus group; Alex is blamed for not meeting with the executives; and Alex points to Bren’s lack of focus groups. Trump then picks on Alex for a bit, saying, “I thought you were a star, and you’re not a star,” all the while Bren stays complacently silent. Alex blames Bren; Bren says he works harder; Alex says he’s hungrier… It just goes on and on.
Finally, Bren gracefully lifts up his foot, inspects his shoe, and gently inserts it into his mouth, toes first. He tells Trump, “I definitely have trouble taking risks; I’m very conservative. It’s an issue I’ve always had to deal with.” George is all, “whaa?”
Like the hungry go-getter that he is, Alex seizes the golden opportunity laid right in front of him. Trump sets it up nicely by asking, “Why should I fire Bren?” as opposed to “Why should I hire you?” coaxing Alex to go into total survivalist (i.e. betrayal) mode. “The fact that he’s not a risk taker. I think he’s good, but he can’t even touch me.” Oooh. We get some glimpse into Alex’s background, which is very…eclectic, to say the least. He was a top ranking ski racer, then went to college, then law school. “I studied in Israel, risk. I moved and worked as a lobbyist in DC, risk.” Interestingly, it seems that he lobbied for the apple industry, because he grew up on an apple farm. Now that is a coming-of-age story that I would like to read. Trump is intrigued by the Israel thing, and it turns out Alex studied archeological rabbinic literature. Wow, he’s like a Jewish Johnny Appleseed. An Alexual Jewish Johnny Appleseed.
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So it’s all just formalities from here on out. Trump says to Bren, “He’s killing you, and you’re not killing him.” Bren’s heart is so not into it, and he just sighs, “It boils down to who do you want?” Carolyn asks, “So who wants this job more?” She’s barely finished speaking when Alex blurts out, “Aye!”
Putting on his mean hat, Trump picks on Bren just because it’s fun. Basically Bren is on the kindergarten level of risk takers, and Trump would rather work with someone at a high school or college level. Not my favorite metaphor of the season, but I think it might be Trump’s first attempt. Also, Bren is fired. Outside the boardroom, the boys hug and express their love, but add the word “bro” at the end so it’s not too gay.
In the cab ride to oblivion, Bren says his peace, which is all sweet and loveable, and he’s too tired even to really call out Alex for turning on him in the boardroom. He admits, “I don’t think I really gave it all the fight that I could.” But happily, Bren is going back home to Memphis to his wife and children, and I must say, I’m gonna miss the funny little man with the tippy bow tie.
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I definitely have trouble taking risks; I’m very conservative. It’s an issue I’ve always had to deal with.
