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Business Rule #3:
Think Big, but not That Big!
September 23, 2004
I have no idea what was in Donald Trump’s mind tonight! There is no way that I would have fired Stacie Jones Upchurch this week. You guys were devastated over his decision last time? Well, I was blown away by this one.
I never would have let a bunch of catty women decide for me whom I should fire. Every one of these ladies completely over-exaggerated the situation, going on and on about how Stacie J. frightened them and made them all nervous. I thought the team met and agreed to let bygones be bygones if Stacie J. never let that happen again. This team is comprised of intelligent yet neurotic women. I especially loved how Maria Boren and Elizabeth Jarosz went back and forth in the boardroom on whose fault it was out of the two of them, only to end up ultimately pointing their fingers at…Stacie J. I can’t wait to see how they do next week with Stacie gone. Who will be their scapegoat then?
If I were in The Donald’s place, I would have proffered a more creative solution. I would have called all the ladies back in, just as Trump did, and listened to them one by one. I though wouldn’t have been so quick to take them at their word, let alone jump all over it. Instead, I would have suspended Stacie from work for one week. If the Apex Corporation won their next task then it would signal to me that Stacie was indeed a disruptive force and that the team could fare better without her, and I would fire her. On the other hand, if the team lost yet again, I would fire not one, but two people, and reinstate Stacie back into the game. Hey, folks, it’s what happens in the real business world everyday. People are routinely suspended pending further investigation of an incident.
I’ve often praised Maria and have even called her fit for a world-class company—and I still stand by that. Yes, it’s true that it was her fault that they went over budget; she’s, however, learned a huge lesson from it: never buy anything based on an estimate that you don’t have in writing. She claimed she wasn’t thinking straight because it was two in the morning. Boo hoo. Let me tell you something, Maria, I’ve gotten calls at three a.m. about construction issues and have had to come up with clear and concise answers on the spot.
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But enough about that! Let’s discuss how the task this week relates to the real business world. The teams were supposed to think big and come up with fantastic gimmicks to generate buzz for a new Crest product. The ladies came up with the idea of Mike Piazza. It was a good idea, but not a great one. One of them mentioned L.L. Cool J. and that’s how they should have gone! Hiring a musician means fanfare, a bigger fan base, and a much louder attraction! You can get radio stations involved and secure better giveaways. The project manager, Elizabeth Jarosz, shot the idea down, however, saying, “I don’t want anyone negative.” So what did the team do? They thought “big” and went with Piazza—but even that was too big for them to handle! Once they got him, it became just how amazingly clear that was. Their creative juices stopped flowing. What they produced next completely astonished me: a bullhorn and a riser. There was barely even a crowd there! What I would really like to know though is who negotiated the deal for Piazza at $20,000 for an hour’s worth of his time. I’ve booked concerts with some of the biggest names in the biz and, in comparative terms, it didn’t cost me anywhere near as much.
The men, on the other hand, went really big at first—but their idea was too big! A million-dollar promotion that had to be underwritten in a few hours time just isn’t realistic. I sat there wondering, “How are they ever going to pull this off on such a tight deadline?” The idea once again was good, but they weren’t able to step back and see the big picture.
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I never would have let a bunch of catty women decide for me whom I should fire.
